“I’ve really been feeling the Kazoo lately,” says John Williams of new Star Wars score


LOS ANGELES- The hype around the arrival of the seventh installation of the Star Wars franchise peaked earlier this week with John Williams’ admission that the new score will prominently feature kazoos. “If you play them really loud they tickle your lips, how great is that?” Williams responded when he was asked how he came upon his decision.

Williams plans to also re-release the scores for the older films with new Kazoo parts edited in. “If Lucas is allowed to dump a CGI Yoda into the films instead of using a puppet, like God intended, then the least I can do is add some sweet, sweet, mouth-buzzing-goodness to my scores,” said the 49 time Academy Award nominee.

Fans have been more than vocal in their support. One intrepid young man who goes by “Carl The Destined” in his iPhone signature has created a series of youtube videos where every single character’s dialogue has been dubbed in Kazoo. And the Star Wars Expanded Universe has even made Kaz-oo the official language of the Kazolians. The Kazolians already existed in the Expanded Universe, because fucking everything exists already in the expanded universe.

Not to be outdone, Start Trek composer Michael Giacchino released the following tweet late last night:




  1. Haha..nice one.. 😂😂😂

  2. […] be a fun thing to write about. And more importantly, Michael Giaccino favorited the satire piece I wrote about him, so I can’t stop […]

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